Commission

The problem of shopping where the sales person receives a commission is that they instantly want to become your best friend. They chat it up. They use big fake smiles. They compliment everything about you. They try every sales tactic and Jedi mind trick to increase their sale. They make me want to puke.

I particularly don't care for this tactic. I don't know anybody else that likes it either. I don't even know if these tactics actually work to increase sales. But I guess some people fall for it, thus perpetuating this terrible behavior.

"He's awfully aggressive," Nathalie whispered while Salesman Sam ran off to find a pair of shoes.

"He's getting on my nerves," I replied, looking over the boxes of unsolicited cheesey cufflinks and studs Salesman Sam retrieved earlier.

After telling Salesman Sam that I had no interest in buying shoes that day, he parried my declination by producing some outlandishly obnoxious cummerbund and bowtie combo packs. I recoiled in disgust.

But despite Salesman Sam annoying me like a pesky mosquito bite that won't quit, I finally found and purchased a tuxedo that I liked. Nathalie liked it, too.

Skriiitch. Cross another item off the wedding planning list.