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It's a strange thing what happens to the body as it ages. First to go was my tolerance for dairy. Well, to be more precise, I'd say that I tolerate dairy products fairly well. It's just that the people standing within whiffing distance don't seem to tolerate my tolerance of dairy.

Now it seems that the next change is the inability to burn off the calories that I ingest. A terrible tragedy of Shakespearean proportions. I've slowly come to accept this inevitable deceleration of my metabolism.

But in utter defiance and denial of my changes, I ingested several grilled sausages on buns yesterday, complete with sauerkraut, mustard, and onions. Plus baked beans and chips. Had there been any ice cream nearby, I would have had that as well.